July 2003 Archives

I found this thing pretty amusing. You'll have to follow the links and do some cutting and pasting to make it happen. But a summary: site generates apathetic online journal entries (worth it by themself), and also features a Sarcasterizer. Combined, they create sarcastic apathetic online journal entries.

Now MARY Has a Blog Now

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Bomb Scare

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About six weeks ago, I went to a conference in San Jose, California, to work at the registration booth and make sure the presentation laptop continued running. At the conference, they served these oysters. They also served unbelievable bruschetta (not pictured), which was eaten in huge quantities by myself and others.

The night before the oysters and bruschetta were served, there was a bomb scare at the hotel. A group of us from work were sitting around drinking, as we usually did on a Tuesday evening, when a horrible buzzing started from the hallway. Somebody said "fire alarm," and we all stood up and walked out. I was wearing my pajamas and no shoes. Two coworkers thought to bring their laptops, but most of us just walked straight out.

In the parking lot of the hotel, there were several long tables of refreshments available. I didn't have any, but there were lots of soda, water, and similar items available. Black-tie waiters were on hand to serve them. Unfortunately, there was no booze.

The hotel's manager told us in the parking lot that he had received a phone call an hour earlier, saying: "There's a bomb in the building, which will go off in two hours." So he called the police, waited an hour, then evacuated the hotel. The parking lot was ringed with police cars and fire trucks. Nobody had any more information than what the manager told us.

We stood around, most people drinking soda, some coworkers trying to get wireless signals from our base station back in the hotel (and failing), then proceeding with work email as needed. I didn't have any shoes on, so I tried not to walk around too much. It was warm, so I wasn't suffering. I wanted to call Mary, since I wasn't sure whether this was, like, national news. Another coworker had thought to bring his cell phone, and was on with his girlfriend the whole time.

We waited there for well over an hour. A few coworkers wandered off, wanting to get away from the hotel. I talked to some other visitors. In general, it was a very jovial bomb scare. We thought it was sort of funny that there was a bomb scare, though there was a little question as to whether it was real. I wished I had thought to bring my laptop out, but then decided my pragmatism in immediately leaving was good enough.

After a long, long time, they told us the hotel was clear, and let us back in. When we returned to our rooms, I called Mary and left a message. Apparently we were not on the news, and this was fairly normal (we were staying at a hotel near the airport). We had a little more to drink, then went to sleep.

Pictured: oysters.

Alameda Poppies



These are some flowers I saw in Alameda. They look sort of computer-generated, but aren't.


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Click on that and stare at it, I dare you. (Several co-workers have found religion after looking it for a minute or two) Found via some random link in chat at work.

Paul - July 2003

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Here's Paul in his new (37-gallon) tank. It's hard to get a good picture of him, since he's very active.

Paul - Christmas 2002



Here's Paul in his old (12-gallon) tank last Christmas. Paul pix are due to Randy's request. I know all of you are just itching for more fish snaps. Anyway, Paul is the fish Randy and I bought to be a character in a movie ("Ice Cream to Follow") which we ended up not shooting. However, Paul has stayed with me. He's a big, strange fish.

Kelly Point Park - Stuff on the Ground



...And this is a bunch of tree-sex-related schmutz that's currently falling off the trees and blowing all over the place.

NOTE: I have closed comments on this entry due to an amazing amount of blog-spam. One wonders why this entry in particular has such high search engine placement. But -- one can't wonder this by entering a comment.

Kelly Point Park

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This is where our wedding will be, August 10, 2003. The little hill is where the ceremony will take place. Not pictured: picnic tables in copse of trees.

Paulette and Pauline

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Our two new fish: Paulette (left) and Pauline (right). We think Pauline is male, due to breeding tubercules on his gills. Paul was added to the tank last week, and is doing well.


Sadly, the float broke down in the middle of the road just after it passed us. We overhead a volunteer fireman saying he thought the emergency brake was on.

A Float at the Alameda 4th Parade



Feeding the fish

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I noticed the fish were looking hungry, so I fed them.

Went to San Francisco

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Mary and I went to SF (Alameda actually) for the 4th, which was fun. There was limited drinking (though alcohol everywhere due to it being California), and grilling of meats and such. This year there was a Bush's Head pinata, rather than last year's Bush's Ass pinata. There will be photos of the new one eventually. It was very well-made (not by me). Mary was the one who finally broke it. There were gross Mounds bars inside.

The Will Mayer Show

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William wrote me today to show me The Will Mayer Show (will need QuickTime 6 or another MPEG-4 player to view). I like this a lot. Particularly the falling down.

Now I Have a Blog Now

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I figured that I enjoyed looking at others' blogs, so now they can look at my blog.

Contacting Chris Higgins

I'm a writer based in Portland, Oregon. I mostly write for Mental Floss magazine (and their website), though I recently had a story on This American Life, and had a cover story last year in The Portland Mercury.

You can follow me on Twitter for occasional jokes, or find me on Facebook for updates on writing and utterly shameless self-promotion.

I'm also a mobile website and smartphone app developer. I work for Cloud Four. In years past, I worked with Night & Day Studios; I helped create Peekaboo Barn, Peekaboo Wild, Big Fat Lies, Life in Short, Cocktail Compass, Nick Jr.'s A-Z With Moose and Zee, Quibble, Savage Love, and a bunch of other apps.

Need to email me? Click the following link, follow the instructions, and you'll have my email address: get Chris's email address.

Copyright Notice: All material on this website is copyright © 2012 Chris Higgins. All rights reserved. If you want to use a photo or other content, please contact me -- my rates are reasonable.

Note: I'm not the (apparently famous) hockey player with the same name! You'll have to find his homepage in order to contact him.